Could Kendall Jenner's Basketball Team Win An NBA Championship?

We are in the midst of the conference finals right now, however there are bigger fish to fry in the basketball world. It is commonly known amongst those who either care about the NBA or the Kardashian family that Kendall Jenner has a Sam Presti level eye for basketball talent. One question has loomed over the NBA for what feels like forever and that is could Kendall’s basketball team win an NBA championship? As the proud owner of a “Kendall basketball starting five” shirt, I am here to deliver the verdict. Before we get started I want to say that this is not intended to slutshame Kendall in any way, I feel like I have to address that because the sports community can be quite toxic to the wives and girlfriends of athletes. If she can consistently pull NBA all stars, then all power to her. This is simply meant to be a funny exercise in team building and in no way a commentary on Kendall. A few of these are also rumours and not fully confirmed by anyone other than internet blogs but I wanted to give myself some leeway here. Allow me to lay a few ground rules for this exercise. Due to the fact that a few members of her team are now retired, for the purpose of this exercise we are going to use how good each player was at the time they were dating Kendall. Also seeing as there aren’t enough guys on the team to fill out an entire roster I am adding two additional stipulations. First, our short rotation means that Tom Thibodeau will be our coach. Secondly, I am allowing myself to include Kyle Kuzma, D’Angelo Russell and Kelly Oubre Jr. which she was never confirmed to have dated any of the three but there was speculation about each of them. I know that’s kind of a stretch, but I need a few players for my bench. Just to let you know what we are working with, this is the list of the players we have at our disposal and the year of their career we will be using for this exercise: Chandler Parsons (2014), D’Angelo Russell (2015), Jordan Clarkson (2016), Blake Griffin (2017), Ben Simmons (2019), Kelly Oubre (2019), Kyle Kuzma (2019), Devin Booker (present). We have eight players here with the inclusion of Kuzma, Oubre and Russell which is certainly enough for a Tom Thibodeau coached team. Devin Booker in his current form should be the head of the snake on offense with Blake Griffin (2017) being a great second option and pick and roll partner for Booker. The rest of my starting five would be Simmons, Oubre and Parsons and I’ll tell you why. The year that Ben Simmons dated Kendall Jenner he finished fourth in defensive player of the year voting and was All-NBA third team. At that point in time Simmons was arguably the best defender in the league at guarding multiple positions and for that reason I need him on the floor. My other two starting spots were a tough decision. I wanted shooting on the floor as Blake Griffin in 2017 was not a floor spacer and Ben Simmons has never been a shooter. Parsons shot roughly league average on 4.7 attempts per game from three while dating Jenner so he gets a spot in my five. The rest of the lot were all below league average shooters at the time of their respectives rumours or relationships. I’ve elected to go with Oubre as he is competent defensively and has played with Booker before. A bench full of young Lakers stars with Clarkson, Russell and Kuzma provides my team with three microwave scorers and not a ton else. Now could this team do well in the NBA? I certainly think this team could make the playoffs at least in the eastern conference, however I do see them struggling in the playoffs. This team would have awful defensive personnel, bad rebounding and inconsistent shooting. Booker, Simmons and Griffin could certainly get this team out of the first round, however I don’t see this team going much farther. I am not sure of either of their relationship status’ but I would implore Kendall to recruit Myles Turner and Cam Johnson in order to allow this team to compete at the highest level. Turner would provide rim protection and rebounding without hurting the spacing on offence and would replace Parsons in the starting five. Johnson could replace Oubre in the starting lineup with his elite floor spacing, solid point of attack defence and an existing chemistry with Booker from their time together in Phoenix. So to answer the question, no I do not think this team would compete for a championship.